Internet Troubles

My internet at the house has been dead for a while now. I been trying to get it repaired, with no success. All of a sudden my roommate has an epiphany.

Suddenly my roommate remembers to mention that in his infinite wisdom, he thought we could save a little money if we turned off the telephone in the house. Good in theory, but in practical application was a real shitty idea. The company that is our internet provider, and may I add is .5% away from being a monopoly in the phone and internet market here, bundles the phone and internet service. My roommate and myself called numerous time to resolve the situation so I wouldn't have to leach off of RSM, or actually go to the college for intellectual purposes, heaven forbid.

So now, the predicament is that I have to do a 20 page paper, type answers to questions from a text book, and complete all my internship work before July so I can go off to my National Guard Annual Training worry free and graduate on time in August.